Anthony Brown will become governor in 2014 and Stephanie Rawlings-Blake will be his lieutenant governor. Ben Cardin’s easy victory on Tuesday shows that any establishment Democrat who follows the party machine can crush the opposition in a statewide general election. PG, Montgomery, Howard county, and Baltimore city are filled with useful idiots who do what the machine tells them to and they love to obey!
There is no Baltimore Democrat or female Democrat running in the 2014 (Governor) primary. The big four (Anthony Brown, Peter Franchot, Doug Gansler, and Ken Ulman) will search for a running mate that can generate Baltimore area and female votes. For these simplistic and mindless demographic reasons alone Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake is the perfect match for any candidate who wants to easily win. There is no risk for the mayor either since if she loses she will still be mayor (partially thanks to yesterday’s Question K). Since the Mayor and Lt. Governor Brown are part of the O’Malley machine they will be paired together. You are probably wondering what these two have accomplished in their respective offices. Yesterday showed that it does not matter what they have done, it only matters what they say they have done and what they promise they will do. It also is important to position your so-called “beliefs” to reflect the trends the masses have already shown they blindly support. The more blind support points you can earn the greater your future victory will be.
Gambling won yesterday so Peter Franchot lost and Stephanie Rawlings-Blake and Anthony Brown won. In 2014 Brown will brag about how great gambling has been and how much money schools will get (in the undefined future). The mayor has her face plastered all over pro-gambling propaganda and will continue to associate herself with this winner of an issue. If the mayor won by proxy in 2012 then she clearly deserves to win in 2014 since she was “wise” enough to jump on the winning bandwagon. Who cares what gambling really does to a city or who really is going to get all that money. All that matters is that Brown and Rawlings-Blake are winners who must be blindly supported.
Immigration won yesterday and Stephanie Rawlings-Blake has been in numerous local and NATIONAL media stories about Baltimore’s immigrant love affair. The immigrant vote is growing and Stephanie Rawlings-Blake has positioned herself nicely amongst those voters. She can say that she personally diversified Baltimore by making it a Hispanic-friendly place all by herself.
Baltimore’s lame leaders won yesterday when voters approved Question K (77% voted yes). Baltimore voters demonstrated that they are the most ignorant voters in the entire state and thus will be the easiest to scam in 2014. They will be so happy to see one of their own citizens on the ticket and they will gladly preach the SRB gospel of how great she has been for Baltimore and how she saved the Grand Prix and made it awesome! She also brought table games to Baltimore so clearly she must be supported at all costs. The extra year she was given yesterday was the final affirmation of her greatness as mayor and clearly she surpasses the likes of William Donald Schaefer who was NEVER able to con his citizens into giving him an extra year in office and the ability to gerrymander the state for his state level buddies on the SAME DAY! Rawlings-Blake is the greatest Baltimore mayor that anyone can remember (since people’s memories only go back five years) and thus is the greatest mayor in the history of Baltimore in the eyes of the masses. Lt. Governor is actually too lowly of a position for her, but don’t worry you will get to vote for her for Governor in 2022!
Governor O’Malley will put a little cherry on top of everything by endorsing this power couple and he will also reassure some of the wavering Democrats that an all black ticket is totally kosher (endorsing an all Black ticket will also gain him “progressive points” in his quest to become President of the USA). His seal of approval should make mindless Baltimore County Democrats easily forget why they (or their parents or grandparents) ran away from the city in the first place and convince them that Baltimore city is clearly an awesome place thanks to Stephanie Rawlings-Blake and that awesome cuddly pro-gambling Raven Jonathan Ogden! Yes who in Baltimore county could forget the Ravens! Eight times a year they enter the city and they even bring their kids that they would never ever send to Baltimore City Schools into the city so obviously the Governor is right and Rawlings-Blake is awesome in all ways and the Wire is just a show on TV even though Baltimore County residents would never venture into the neighborhoods portrayed in that show unless they are drug addicts.
This post may sound like a joke to many of you, but I am dead serious. The 5% or less of the voters who actually think before voting are probably more likely to read this and thus question my rationale, but they must realize how freaking mindless the overwhelming majority of voters are in Maryland especially in the four high population jurisdictions (and probably Baltimore County also) I alluded to above. Save this post and review it in 2014…
BaltimoreHourly.com 
You nailed it! I should frame this and put it on billboards in 2014.
Eh, the Democratic voters in the 1st District are worse than the voters in Baltimore. 89,000 of them voted for a woman who withdrew from the race because she may have committed a felony.